


Spaces

by glass_owl



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, kinda sad, mentions of other seijou characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-25
Updated: 2015-06-25
Packaged: 2018-04-06 03:32:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4206342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glass_owl/pseuds/glass_owl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spaces are monsters Iwaizumi hates. (Oikawa helped close them.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spaces

**Author's Note:**

> I'm currently working on another Iwaoi fic but but I got sidetracked with angsty stuff. More notes at the bottom! It might be a little choppy and a little shitty but thanks for reading :] Comments are appreciated TvT

Iwaizumi doesn't know what to do with the spaces between his fingers. 

He's spent so long with slim cold fingers in between his, fitting like little puzzle pieces, that now that they were gone, he just didn't know what to do with all that fucking space. He clenches and unclenches his fists, nails biting into his palm, a habit he starts to pick up, because if anything, a clenched fist closes gaps. There are usually deep crescents rasterized into his palm and they burn like white fire.

But it's not enough to heal that other empty space and hurt in his heart. ( _Too much space._ )

-

It's not the only thing that changes. The classes are quieter with the empty seat next to his. The stupid window seat that they fought over. No more note passing or texting under the table even when they're just sitting next to each other. No more getting scolded by teachers for not paying attention and of course his classmates don't tease him for putting up with the annoying, flamboyant other. Because Iwaizumi loves him and it doesn't matter how much of an idiot his other could be, he would always put up with him. (And love him right.)

But his grades fall even though there are no distractions and he goes home alone everyday with too much silence wreathing around him. The music in his ears are a blur of sounds and he can't make out the voices. ( _It's not the voice he wants to hear._ )

-

Volleyball practice is different too. 

He's the new captain because _he's_ not there to lead them anymore. Yahaba takes on the position of the setter and Iwaizumi sees a pattern when the second year stays last for extra practice, wearing himself down to the bone. He doesn't say anything because he's too emotionally spent on his own terms. Instead he gets Watari to watch over Yahaba, makes him wait for Yahaba with a quencher and some towels and to make sure Yahaba doesn't stay later than 8pm. 

He doesn't want to be captain ( _he misses his captain too_ ).

-

His friends are concerned but even they are suffering from a form of backlash. 

Hanamaki and Matsukawa don't say it but Iwaizumi knows they're kind of hanging their regrets on stars, hoping and praying. They've spent so long making him the butt of the joke, they've forgotten to tell him they appreciate him. And now that he's missing from the picture, there's a black hole in their unbreakable quadruple and an even bigger hole in their throats. 

They buy too many glow in the dark stars so he won't be lonely at night. ( _They shine so brightly even when everything is dark, it's almost like he's there._ )

-

Iwaizumi goes to the shrine every day. Sometimes Hanamaki comes, sometimes Matsukawa, sometimes both and sometimes no one. He used to toss in 50 yen, but then he starts throwing in 100 and suddenly he's spending 500 a trip. It burns a hole through his pocket but he's so desperate and his heart hurts so badly, 500 yen is a cheap price to pay if the hole in his heart could close.

He spends so much at the shrine that he starts living off milk bread instead of buying decent meals. 

It tastes like shit but it closes all that unnecessary space around him, shrouding him with a presence that he longs for. They're cheap enough and Iwaizumi is pretty sure _he_ would be proud because Iwaizumi hates milk and here he is, living off it like it's his only means of survival. _(It probably is)_.

-

On Iwaizumi's birthday, no one comes in through his window at midnight with a present and the first person to text him a birthday wish isn't the same as every year. No one waits outside his gates in the morning, with a big cheesy grin and no one kisses him or gives him this bone crushing hug, lips too close to the shell of his ear. 

On Iwaizumi's birthday, he only wishes for one thing. ( _He doesn't unwrap the presents because no one gave him what he wanted - wants_ ).

-

Oikawa is everywhere yet he is nowhere.

He is in almost everything Iwaizumi owns - the pens and the shirts and the sheets. He is in Iwaizumi's veins, beating in his chest and lodged in the back of his throat. Iwaizumi spent so long twined together with Oikawa, he doesn't really know how to function without him. The mere absence of him leaves him hollow, empty.

Everything else seems bigger, scarier. _(Oikawa helped him fight monsters.)_

-

Spaces are monsters Iwaizumi hates. _(Oikawa helped close them.)_

-

_He opened them too._

-

Iwaizumi doesn't know what to do with the space between his fingers. _(There is too much fucking space)._

**Author's Note:**

> I chose not to put character death as a rating because it was vague and up to interpretation. He might have died or he might be in a hospital or he might have been kidnapped and gone missing or smth. There are so many ways to interpret this but ofc if you feel super strongly that no, this has to be tagged with major character death then just lemme know and i'll do it.


End file.
